Retiring from my job is like retiring from the mob

I decided to sleep in today, knowing that the weekend would be jam-packed with tailgating and parties. Gus and Bobby let themselves in around 8am and went back to work on the bathroom. I finally drug myself from bed around 10:30am and went down to confront the rest of the wallpaper.  

 After much cursing and beating of the walls, Bobby came down once to make sure I wasn’t having a “see-sure”, I broke for lunch. Once I was refueled, it only took another hour and a half to have the walls completely stripped. Thank God that is over! I promptly decided that sanding and repapering would have to wait at least a week. 

As I was putting everything up, the phone rang, my investor/partner/former client Jeff. He was calling for what I am sure will be the first of many updates on the rehab. I regaled him with a list of all that had been accomplished to date, the great bargain/resource that is Mercurio Bros. and a reconciliation of expenses to the projected monthly draw. He was elated at how far ahead and under budget we are, even though I kept reminding him that we were only half way through the month and only at the beginning of the rehab. 

Just when I thought I had past the test without any crazy request or demands: 

“Do you remember the Mosaic deal? Well we are finally going to the table on that on Friday morning. I need you in my corner.” 

“This Friday?” I asked. 

“8am at RG Consulting’s offices. If I remember, your rate is $175 per hour. Figure out your flight arrangements and call them into my assistant and she will book it all. I’ve got a conference call I need to be on *Click*.” 

Well, I guess I didn’t completely abandon my old life after all. At least he is going to pay my old rate, which for once will go entirely into my own pocket. My old boss J. Alice Ross, Al in the industry, is going to shit a brick when she sees me across the table. That will be priceless!  

I spent the next hour weighing flight options and relaying my choice to Jeff’s dopey secretary Mae. She has to be the dullest woman ever to hold a full time job! As soon as she was able to repeat back to me exactly what I requested, it took 9 trys, I called Janey to make sure she was okay with me showing up a day early. As I suspected, it was no trouble. Now that only left making sure Gus and Bobby could be finished with both bathrooms before tomorrow night. They assured me they would be or they would knock $300 off the bill. Knowing how much they liked a profit, I figured that was a better guarantee than them swearing on their mother’s grave, saint’s preserve her.